Funny, Not Funny

Not funny? Laptop playing coy. Stuck in terminal startup repair. And yes, I am a stupid douchebag who didn't back some stuff up and I deserve everything I get. But come ON, it's my birthday month and SO NOT FAIR. Also, I'm tired and everything hurts. My elbow hurts. My knee hurts. My neck hurts. My back and feet and eyebrows hurt. My vagina hurts. Apparently now that I'm forty I can party like a twenty year old, but only if I'm prepared to feel like a sixty year old for a few days after. And the school barbecue was last night. I hate the fucking school barbecue. Eve loves the fucking school barbecue. Naturally -- what's not to love about standing in an enormous line for substandard food, standing in more enormous lines for some ridiculous inflatable things, some of which have height requirements which aren't announced until the too-short kids get to the very end of the fucking enormous line and make me have to get a little snippy with a volunteer in a yellow shirt and his little megaphone, which is not fair, because you really shouldn't be snippy with volunteers, except he really was annoying with his little megaphone and his bellowing about snow cones and tug of wars when dude, you set up these bloody primary-coloured inflatables and guess what? snow cones and tug of wars (tugs of war?) sort of lose their allure. And then when we were finally done with the stupid inflatables the barbecue was ending and there was no more face painting or snow cones and Eve was pissed. Unfortunately, not pissed enough to last until next year and convince her that we shouldn't go. Whatever, I did it for the school. And the children.

Funny? This. You just know he would never get snippy with a yellow-shirted megaphone-abusing volunteer.