Mediocre Pictures of the Day of AWESOME

Mostly it was awesome because, you know why?

Because I wasn't on a FUCKING FIELD TRIP, that's why.

Not that this wasn't fun:



Okay, actually it wasn't that fun. It was fun going with the kindergarten class. OH MY GOD, A COW. OH MY GOD, A HORSE. OH MY GOD, A TRACTOR. Seven and eight year olds are just too freaking jaded. I found it mildly amusing when our guide told them to try not to freak out and laugh and shriek when the animals, ahem, relieved themselves, because it was upsetting and unsettling for the animals. I wanted to pat the woman on the shoulder and console her for having just uttered possibly the most useless statement anyone has spoken, ever.

I was soundly vindicated some moments later. OH MY GOD, IT'S PEEING!!!!!!!!

The only fun part was when I found my friend Collette who was there with her daughter's class and we sat on a bench watching the kids play on the play structure and talking about how badly we would suck as teachers:

Me: "Yeah, it would be bad. I'd have favourites, and I wouldn't bother to hide it. I would always pick the same kid to take the attendance list to the office."
Collette: "I'd be even worse. I'd have kids I didn't like, and I wouldn't bother to hide it. I'd be all, 'put your hand down Bobby, no one cares what you think'."

That was awesome.

So anyway, today. My Mom told me yesterday that she had decided that for my birthday she would plant my front planter for me. This is possibly the best idea I have heard ever. Of course, being my Mom, she was on my doorstep with bags of dirt and a bunch of plants by the time I wandered down from the shower, or I would have a 'before' picture, which would really bring home the full effect of this gift. Sadly, the lopsided display of overplanted grape hyacinths and the one measly yellow tulip with its mutant dandelion offspring went unphotographed.

But you still get that this is WAY BETTER, right?:



While my mother was slaving in the heat and dirt, I swanned off with Pam to buy linens, since the other night I rolled over and bed and my toe caught on something and there was a loud ripping noise. Shut up, it was a tiny hole in the bottom sheet becoming a great big gaping hole in the bottom sheet. So we went to The Linen Chest, where a lovely woman who I think might have been just a tiny bit high kept telling us that if we needed help to call her Rebecca - or maybe it was if we needed help to call her, Rebecca - and then she talked about how my smile was lovely and real and we - Pamela and Allison, which were beautiful real names - were warm, which was good because cold people sucked her energy. Then she gave us chocolate, so it was all good. I bought green sheets with tiny subtle polka dots in them.

Then we went to Pier One where I picked this up, ON A WHIM:



(Guys! It has CUPHOLDERS!)



...and this REALLY NICE warehouse guy helped us load it in the van. Then we went to Red Lobster for lunch and our server was named KAITLYN - and YES, she totally fit into the parade of INSANELY HELPFUL and possibly slightly chemically altered service people that came our way in the day of awesome.

Then we came home. And before I went to pick the kids up for school, I was looking out in the backyard at the cardboard wrapped chair pieces that my lovely husband has since assembled into an actual chair, and there was a fly buzzing around. So I opened the screen door - and it flew out.

See? Awe. Some.