Thursday, August 19, 2010

The Post that got More Untitleable the Longer I Typed

I saw something horrifying in the paper today. It was an ad for The Bay about Maidenform's new bra, 'Like Magic'. Apparently it (shudder) increases the bust by two sizes. I can't even bear to think about it.

Eve and Angus are having supper while I'm not really paying attention. Eve sort of chokes and coughs a bit. I ask her if she's okay and she doesn't answer so I ask again a bit louder. She says yes, but keeps coughing. Angus says "take a drink, Eve!". Eve says, in an extremely annoyed tone, "I just did and it made me choke!"

Email from Angus to my husband after his baseball game on Monday night:

hi dad,

so we played Orleans yesterday and we tied 7-7 but we should have won. What happend was there was a wild pitch so the runner on third scored. But the catcher threw the ball over the pitcher but the third baseman got it and threw it home. The pitcher blocked the plate and the runner slide beside it and the pitcher tagged him. But the umpire said that the pitcher didn't tag him so then we got the final out to end the game. That was the end

Angus,

p.s. it seems the umpires hate us this year.

This episode of Spongebob takes place in the Old West. Spongebob when you're not in the mood for it is annoying. Spongebob when you're not in the mood for it and all the characters are speaking in cowboy accents is excruciating.

Angus and I were driving home from baseball and he said "I miss Daddy. Even though he's only been gone for a week. But it feels like he's been gone for six days." I said, "uh...he has". Angus said "exactly!" ???????????????

Yeah, this post is dorky. Whaddya want from me? My husband's in freaking China. And the umpires hate us.

11 comments:

theycallmejane said...

Ok. I LOVE your title. It's perfect. And has happened to me more than I can imagine. I'm just jealous you thought of that title first!

Amber said...

Two sizes which way? I must know. Band size or cup size - or BOTH. You must be clearer with us, 'Like Magic' bra.

Julie said...

how long's the hubby in china? he better bring back from awesome gifts!

the mombshell said...

you need to freaking link up to that bra, as you know I've got some money to burn on bras (or I will in less than twenty days)

SuziCate said...

Heck, where's that bra been all my life?! It's a lot cheaper and less painful than surgery...but really, I've gone without all these years!! Man, hard enough that hubby is in China, but the umpire hates you, too!!!! but we love you and we don't like that mean umpire!

Nicole said...

Ha! Those bras are hilarious. I have a B cup and I tried on one of those maximizing, padded bras and MY WORD PEOPLE. It was just not a good look. Sometimes it's better just to be natural. Oh, also, I know this woman who is teeny tiny, I mean about 85 pounds, and she got a boob job. She was an A cup and now she's a D cup and YIKES. Stay natural, people, stay natural.

Patti Murphy said...

Can one EVER be in the mood for Sponge Bob? Ever?

Reading Nicole's comment reminded me of how one writer described these women who all had boob jobs at their narco boyfriends' behest. The word was "pneumatic". How perfect is that?

The Mayor! said...

Ya know, sometimes we just gotta do the random crap! It's those crazy little moments that stand out sometimes but don't always fit in to one overall context!

Admittedly, I may have to seek out more info on this magic you speak of...

:-D

Mom of the Perpetually Grounded said...

Loved the peek at the day.
I'm feeling the Spongebob pain but oculd actually use a little cup of magic.

Shan said...

Love this post. Hope your husband is back soon!

Betsy B. Honest said...

If only they'd make a Matron Form bra that would lower my bustline by two inches...