Thursday, September 29, 2011

George.

Yes. I have named this post George because this post has proven otherwise unnameable. I considered 'Spinning my Wheels' or "Blurry and lacking in focus" and "little nuggets of pure crazy" and nothing worked. I will call it George.

So apparently I should put a honking big slash between the Biblio and the Mama because (and I really should have known this), I can only do ONE THING at a time. I can blog regularly, or I can do book reviews. So not surprising. Whenever people talk about working out at lunch hour or stopping at the gym on the way home from work I try not to stare at them with my mouth gaping unattractively, but I'm always thinking "huh. So not everyone has Exercise Day, where they exercise first thing in the morning and then spend the rest of the day recovering from said exercise?"

I've been on this baking-for-the-lunch-boxes kick because it's the beginning of the year and I'm still optimistic and energetic (well anyway, I'm marginally less beaten down and demoralized than I will be come February). The kids love those chocolate-covered-coconut bars, so I've turned out batch after batch of chocolate-dipped coconut macaroons, because they're fresh and homemade! and I know all the ingredients! Of course, the fact that those ingredients include sweetened condensed milk and chocolate detracts from the virtuousness somewhat, but still.... Tonight I realized two things. 1. I don't have to look at the recipe any more. 2. We're all so sick of chocolate-covered coconut things we never want to see another one. Naturally I have NO IDEA where to go from here.

I couldn't sleep last night. Then the back of my head got itchy and I scratched it and then spent the next two hours obsessing over the weirdness of back of my skull. Does everyone have this odd shelf of bone halfway up, or have I been walking around with a permanent depressed skull fracture? God help me if I ever go bald.

Remember when I took the kids to Lafl├Ęche and we did the kids' obstacle course? My friend Collette has decided that the adults of our four families need to do the adult course. The three-and-a-half-hour really-high-up I'll-make-a-man-out-of-you adult course. Except Matt's going to be away. I said I couldn't go without someone to encourage and support me and tolerate being cursed at without holding a grudge and everyone else said I could use their husbands for that. So I'm going. Even though I'm afraid of heights and those harnesses are really unflattering. What does it say about me that I'm slightly more afraid of humiliation than I am of death?

Wow. This post may have reached a new pinnacle of frivolous lunacy (lunatic frivolity?) Of course, I went to the gym this morning, so really, what did you expect?

15 comments:

Sandra said...

I happen to think you're title is brilliant. And although I didn't start feeling the back of my head to analyze the shape of my skull, I did start to scratch my head, and wondered if I had head lice.

Nan | WrathOfMom said...

As soon as I read about your itchy head, I thought "LICE!" and started scratching. Hence I take comfort from Sandra's comment.

I love that you named this post George. That's so funny. And now I'm jealous of your clever funniness.

Bridget said...

Your title cracked me up!

Yeah, good luck and have fun on the adult course. And I'm glad it's you and not me ;)

NoisyBluebird said...

Little nuggets of pure crazy. Can I steal that phrase as a book title? lol

Patti said...

What Sandra said. Thanks, Sandra. Now I keep thinking I have lice. Eff you.

Yeah. And Allison--"homemade chocolate covered macaroons". Way to raise the bar to impossible levels for school lunches. Eff you too.

Kelly said...

I totally felt my head. No itchiness though. Y'all need to get checked!

PS - I can't multitask well at all. I feel like I'm supposed to be able to, but I just can't and when I try, nothing good happens.

Nicole said...

I love your lunacy!!!

I like to do the baking for school snacks thing, and I always feel virtuous, even if the vast majority of my recipes include white sugar, chocolate chips, and butter.

Magpie said...

wheels of steel.
wheat germ snickerdoodles.
chocolate chip oatmeal cookies.

fred.

Marilyn (A Lot of Loves) said...

"I will name him George. I will hug him and pet him and squeeze him."

Occasionally I feel the urge to shave my head just so I can examine the shape of it. I've never admitted that to anyone. Keep away from me with that razor.

Also, you have balls of steel to do that course. I bow down in awe. I don't think I could manage it.

the mombshell said...

You are my favourite.

Julie said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2JlVqfC8-UI


i would have totally been your cheerleader at la fleche. it's so awesome!

Shan said...

I love your little nuggets of pure crazy!

Mary Lynn said...

My home-baked food the kids are totally sick of is banana bead. Last time I made it Jamie told me he likes, "but only on a Monday." Unfortunately, I still like it any day of the week, so guess who ended up eating most of the loaf.

And, wow I'm impressed you're going to do the adult course at Lafleche. I hope you at least get a good stiff drink at the end of it.

Lynn said...

My skull is more uneven from side to side - the left side at the back seems to stick out more than the right. I cannot tell you how many hours I have spent wondering if how I sleep has affected the development of my skull, and trying to force myself to sleep in odd positions so my skull hopefully rights itself before anyone notices that I am woefully misshapen.

Oh my God...I AM CRAZY.

Amber said...

I was all about the regular exercise before starting work, three times a week. I was training for Run for the Cure, but I promised myself that I would continue my schedule afterwards because I am now Awesome Runner Woman. It is now three days later and I have put on my running clothes twice, but actually gone running zero times. So exercise day may be a good option for me.

Also? I find it hard to believe that it's possible to get tired of chocolate covered coconut things. Plus, bonus, chocolate and coconut are both gluten-free!