I'll Remember This on Mother's Day

 The Halloween Party host just sent out some pictures and I was looking at them again. This reminded me of the time years ago when my parents were living with us for a few months before they got their new house. We went to the Halloween party, came home and dropped the kids so my parents could put them to bed, and went back for a bit. When I got home my mom was in the kitchen about to go down to bed. She looked at me and said "so did you have to drink that penalty drink?" because I was wearing a colourful long skirt with a v-neck top. I said, a tiny bit indignantly, "no, I had wings on and I was a Gypsy moth." She was walking down the stairs and yelled back cheerfully, "oh, that's kind of lame!"

Random pictures I came across while looking for this one.

Indiana Jones and cheerleader

Snow White with bony friend

Snow White super feeling herself

Smunchkins

Facing the Music

 I tried to schedule a surly Thursday post and I wrote it and then reread it and it all seemed so ridiculously petty I couldn't bear to post it.

There's been something I've been thinking about off and on since I went to Cityfolk for Indigo Girls and Melissa Etheridge and then saw people talking about it on Reddit. Most people were rapturous, floating on nostalgia vibes, couldn't say a bad word. A few people complained that Emily Saliers' voice was not what it used to be. And it definitely wasn't - it sounds like she maybe has a tremor that affects her voice, which could mean some scary things for her health. One person said "sorry, the Indigo Girls set was weak" and another said if they'd known they wouldn't have gone to the concert.

So these are the random thoughts I've had about that.

What do musicians owe their audience? I've kicked it around, and I think what I've settled on is that they owe us the best set they are capable of performing on the day that we see them. There are multiple issues that could affect this - temporary sickness, permanent sickness, age, etc. If their sound deteriorates to the point that people don't want to pay to see them anymore, then that's fine.

If you're thinking of paying big money to see a musician/band that's important to you, do you do any research to see what their last few concerts have been like? It was not at all difficult to find discussions about Emily's voice in recent years. I didn't look up anything because frankly I didn't care. The Indigo Girls were the soundtrack of my youth, and I was in no matter what. I was also seeing them at a festival, so the tickets weren't crazy expensive. Eve bought much pricier tickets to see one of her favourite musicians (Ethel Cain) - took an uncharacteristic risk on a re-seller who didn't send the tickets out until two days before the concert - and you better believe she knew the ins and outs of every recent concert.

I saw the Indigo Girls in Toronto almost exactly thirty years ago when my friend Janet bought the tickets for my birthday. I am not the same person I was thirty years ago, and I did not expect that they would be either. I saw Melissa Etheridge about five years ago, so I was pretty confident she would still be flawless, and she was. 

I wasn't particularly bothered by the people who complained. I understand the disappointment. Nance's recent post made me think about it again - she's in the 'concerts are too peoply' camp. If one of your favourite acts is coming somewhere nearby do you jump on it, or consider all the factors? 

Wordless Wednesday

 More properly "not MY words", but that doesn't flow as well. And now I'm adding a bunch of words anyway. Damn, I suck at this. I present, Eve being salty about Daylight Saving Time six years apart.

You Are All Awesome

 There is usually a point during NaBloPoMo where I'm really happy I decided to do it again, and it comes at various points, but not usually so early.

For various reasons, I have stepped away from the book club I've belonged to here in Ottawa since before Angus was born, so... 27-ish years? It was the right decision, and I have missed it, but not enough that I am questioning my decision. 

But WOW, everybody talking about book stuff on yesterday's post was fun! I wrote and published it a bit anxiously because 1) I do most things a bit anxiously and 2) I was afraid of sounding like an elitist. But I DO have some elitist opinions about talk show hosts recommending books, I DO! I am really happy for any author that Oprah Or Reese or Jenna recommends, because they're going to get huge publicity and more money. I am really happy that people that love these women will hear "go buy this book" and home in on their nearest bookstore like they're a sleeper agent that has been activated by a code message.

But I do want to make it known, somehow, that THEY'RE not the same kind of reader I am. Like Nance said, I don't want a copy with a sticker or, worse, a NON-REMOVABLE icon on the cover because I don't want people to see me reading it and think I'm only reading it because Oprah told me to. And I know this is dumb! And looking at all the lists yesterday I realized that ALL of them had books on them that I loved as well as books I didn't love. And if a friend recommended that many books to me and I didn't like some I wouldn't automatically think they're bad at recommending books. So am I just a snob?

Yep. Little bit. And I think I'm comfortable with that in this case. Those people that only read Oprah-recommended books likely have skills and strengths where they excel and I do not, but reading is not one. And the issue I often have with books that catch some kind of wave and everyone reads them - like Fifty Shades of Grey and The Da Vinci Code - is that often they are an example of a genre where they are thousands of other books that are as good if not better, but people tend to read that one book, talk about it as if it's the be-all and end-all, and then never read another book in that genre. 

Do you remember The Celestine Prophecy and/or The Shack? Both of these were popular during my time at the bookstore, and people would come in and rave about them and say they were so glad "a book like that" was making it out to people. I read them both. They were populist dreck. The Celestine Prophecy was a bunch of faux-mystical claptrap and The Shack was badly-written and had cringe racial stereotypes (IN MY OPINION, I hasten to add). I would have to close my eyes to prevent myself from rolling them when another customer came in rhapsodizing. 

But also, that's fine. Any book that goes stratospheric, whether I think it's good or not, has something arbitrary happen somewhere in the process. There are likely books in the slush pile that are just as good (if not better), as books that get published, although I worked at an audio publisher for a while and worked my way through a slush pile, and I have to say, there are fewer buried treasures in there than I hoped there might be ("UFOs, Religion, and You" - not good, friends, it was not good).

I would say this makes me hopeful for my NaBloPoMo momentum, but tomorrow is my longest work day and then I'm driving five hours on Thursday for a weekend away, so not so much. Still, fun.

Pictures of my bookshelves, pretentious and less so. 

Famous People Who Read

I scanned through my email this morning and saw a blog pitch email with the title "Celebrate the magic of the season", and I thought "The magic of WHAT SEASON". I can't remember if Nicole starts Tiny Secret Festive Season on the actual first day of November, but I am NOT ready to start thinking about Christmas just yet. And American friends, you have to get through Thanksgiving first! This is a poor distribution of holidays, if you ask me, although something to light the darkness of November is perhaps not the worst thing ever.

I'm trying to decide if i should make a weekly schedule for post topics like Sarah (I will jump on any chance to be more like Sarah). I used to do Mondays on the Margins for book reviews, but I mostly save those for the year-end post now. I could do the Whining Wednesday, but if I revive Surly Thursdays that's a lot of whining. I CAN produce that much whining without effort, but I probably should not.

For a loose Monday Margins thing, let's talk about celebrity book clubs. I have no problem with celebrity book clubs. Anything that gets people reading more is a good use of a platform. That said, I do have a really unattractive habit of assuming that the books might be simplistic, or formulaic or gimmicky, in order to appeal to a wide audience that contains some people who perhaps do not traditionally read a lot

Waaaaay back pre-marriage and kids, I worked in an adorable little bookstore in Toronto. I wandered by one day and went in, and it was so amazing I went home and sent an email saying I knew they probably weren't hiring but if they ever were I would love to be considered. And they hired me! I only got to work there for a couple of years before we moved to Ottawa, but it was a great experience. So one day I was behind the little counter and someone came in and asked for The Deep End of the Ocean by Jacqueline Mitchard. We may have had one copy, or none - it was a very small bookstore and couldn't carry a huge amount of stock, but we could usually order anything. So I sold it to her, or filled out an order slip, and went about my work day. Then another person came in and asked for the same book. Then another. I started to feel like I was being punked and looking around for a camera, and finally asked someone why everyone was asking for this book. She said "Oprah Winfrey recommended it 

Cool cool cool. A LITTLE HEADS UP WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE, OPRAH. Every bookstore was soon drowning in orders for this book. Yippee for the author. I think that after the first few books she started giving publishers a warning at least, so they could increase the print run.

Okay, I said I wasn't mad about it, but I am a little. There was an "Oprah Effect" that meant that publishers started choosing fiction based on what Oprah might like, and this included "moving, painful human stories" which could tend to the overblown and melodramatic and, frankly, I don't love the idea of publishers promoting or rejecting books based on a talk show host's whims. And then she cancelled her book club because it was apparently difficult for her to find books she wanted to share. Yes in all the fiction published everywhere there was nothing up to Oprah's exacting standards, *eye roll* I think she has a book club again, but after that it was kind of dead to me. 

ANYWAY. The Deep End of the Ocean was a perfectly fine book - not one I would consider a great book club entry, but fine. A friend said she wasn't having good luck with Reese's picks, and I scanned the list and the only books I had read were thrillers that, again, were fine (okay, one I hated) but not the kind of dense, chewy, possibly polarizing book I usually consider a suitable book club pick. I'm not a book snob! I read genre fiction extensively, I don't judge anyone for what they like to read, and there are different books for different readers. For book club, though, I have slightly more exacting standards 

Anyway AGAIN, in the past month I accidentally read two books that turned out to be featured in Jenna  Bush's Read With Jenna Book Club, and they both blew me away. One was The Dream Hotel by Laila Lalami, about the surveillance state taken to new extremes, where a brain implant meant to regulate sleep spies on your dreams and can lead to incarceration based on dreams that are assumed to prophesize violent acts. The other was The Names by Florence Knapp, which begins with a woman going to register her newborn son's name - he is to be named Gordon, after her abusive husband. The story then splits into three powerful narratives based on her choosing three different names, and how this affects her future and that of her two children. Both of these books had an actual physical effect on my breathing and heart rate. The reverberations of trauma to future generations, the arbitrary cruelty and powerlessness experienced by people in the carceral system, the way the smallest decisions can have an enormous impact - all explored with sharp, profound writing. 

So fine. I may periodically look at what Jenna is reading, or at least I won't try NOT to. Seems like Oprah has some pretty good picks in the long list on her website too. 

How do you feel about celebrity book clubs? If you're in a book club, are there any rules for what you read? 

 

Halloween Party

 First of all, Lucy is NOT cool with the time change. She has been standing there alternately staring at her food bowl and me for the last fifteen minutes. We usually feed her at five, and I am determined to hold out at least until four, and then shift gradually over the next couple of weeks.

Content warning: Mild drunken debauchery. Skip if that's not your thing. 

As I mentioned, our friends Janet and Dave always have a Halloween party the Saturday before Halloween. It's potluck for food, they usually make some kind of yummy drink and there is a penalty drink for anyone who doesn't wear a costume. The implication is that the penalty drink will be unpalatable, but I don't recall anyone ever having to drink the penalty drink. 

The party begins the same - we arrive, admire everyone's costumes, catch up with anyone we haven't seen for a while - but, unsurprisingly, it doesn't always end the same, and the vibe is variable. Some years we go hard until 4 a.m. and I walk home, and have to walk over to retrieve my vehicle and whatever is left of my dignity. Some years we end up watching a bunch of music videos and arguing about the best guitar players and impugning everyone else's taste in music. Some years it's mellow and we just sit around and talk.

Human disco ball. She threw really cool lights on the ceiling.

 

Ghostbuster. There were no ghosts at the party, well done Dave

Viking

Other viking. Dog.

Disco ball, Yukon Cornelius from Rudolph, Laura Ingalls, K-Pop Demon Hunter

This year Caitlin - Janet and Dave's daughter - brought out her homemade Chutes and Ladders drinking game, which I maintain should have an upper age limit if you're actually drinking alcohol, because it was acceptable to play and just drink Coke or water.

I have also mentioned that most of our kids who still live locally inexplicable choose to hang out with us, and then some of their friends end up also hanging out with us, and sometimes I wonder if it all might become the slightest bit...

unseemly?...

All consenting adults!

Honestly, when I first read 'baby birding' I was worried we'd have to spit the shot in someone's mouth, so this was kind of a relief. 

Arm wrestle

Staring contest

Jacob having to do jumping jacks until Melanie took a shot. She took her time. 

I was relying on Rachel's girlfriend Alina to help me find my playing piece and move it the appropriate number of spaces and then read whatever was on the space, not because I was too drunk to read, but because my eyes were too old and I didn't have my reading glasses. So I should not have been surprised when Collette later revealed that the younger set started conspiring to have Michael land on all the spaces with embarrassing stuff. This worked out fine because Michael is a good sport, and is probably the only one that would have been able to wear Rachel's costume easily when they had to trade.

Rachel looked kind of fire in his costume also, so win-win?

Na Na Hey Hey Blo Your Blues Away (or Something)

First of all, apologies for falling behind on commenting - I got a lovely new chromebook with a much better keyboard for typing, but it would not hold an internet connection for more than thirty seconds, which was driving me slowly mad. Matt got home from California and took five minutes to decide that unplugging the wi-fi booster might do it. And it did.

I believe I usually milk the Halloween thing for at least one or two days of NaBloPoMo, which I shall continue today. A couple of people commented on our Louvre Robbery costumes as 'timely', to which I replied "yes, almost as if we didn't have a single costume idea before that, he he *nervous chuckle*). Our friends Janet and Dave have a Halloween party on the Saturday before Halloween every single year, so I have zero excuses for being caught costume-less two days before the party, and yet I went to the craft show and for lunch with my friends Pam (HI PAM) on Thursday and confessed that I was completely costume-blocked. She blithely said "just pick something from the news. How about the Louvre Robbery?"(YOU'RE SO SMART PAM) and my jaw dropped because I had been looking at a sparkly top in my closet that very morning wondering if I could spin something out of it. We looked at a couple of articles and I ordered a neon harness and toy ladder for Matt and when I got home I dug out a toy crown.

This made me think about how it's kind of weird that some years I know exactly what I'm going to be months ahead of time, some years I am hopelessly muddled until the day of, and some years it's kind of in between. We've bought costumes a couple of times, but my preference is to make something out of household stuff and clothes we own (not by sewing, which I cannot do)- costumes are ridiculously expensive, although some of them look really good.

So for the last decade or so:

The fairly-well-thought out entries

2014 - Voodoo doll
2024 - Bumblebee and Molecular Formula for Honey
2022 - present (I don't recommend it - turns out gift bags don't breathe at all)
Matt was out of the country so I had to pose for my picture with Tony Scissorhands

The scrabbled-together-the-day-of contenders:

2017 - Rhythm and Blues
2019 - Deviled Egg and This is Your Brain on Drugs
2021 - Regular Comma and Oxford Comma
I thought this might be the year I had to go costume-less and drink the penalty drink. Then I found this 'God's time is NOW' pamphlet in the mailbox in the morning and riffed on it.

The unabashedly slutty years

2015 - Easy Reader

A friend lent me a "Dark Alice in Wonderland" costume, which turned out to be a French maid costume with the Cheshire cat on the apron. I said "I look like a stripper". Eve said "No y.... well.... oh it's fine, let's just go." My rack was fantastic, I have zero regrets.