Eastering While Anxious
I said I was going to do a few posts in a row about things I'm self-conscious about. The next one was going to be medications. After that.... thinking.... checking drafts folder.... oh, it was about Lucy. I'm going to do them, but I don't think today. Today I just want to get another post in before a week or more goes by to preserve the habit.
We're going to London Ontario to my sister's for Easter. This is wonderful because I love my sister and her husband and her kids, and I love us all being together. This is only a tiny bit stressful because I'm bad at traveling and I don't love sleeping in a bed that isn't mine, and we're driving down with my parents and my mother is a wonderful, wonderful woman who doesn't have much of an ability to roll with things and says things in anxiety that she doesn't realize can be hurtful to other people, which causes me a bit of anxiety about traveling with her.
It's also a tiny bit sad because Angus can't come because he's coaching four games this week-end, and Eve can't come even though we'll only be an hour and a half away from her, because it's end of term which is even worse than exam time, because everything is due by Wednesday. Matt and I are going to drive in to Hamilton on Saturday and deliver food and the mountain of stuff my mom has baked (because she is wonderful) and hugs and Easter chocolate. My niece and nephew are both coming home for at least a day or two, so that will be fun.
(Funny aside about this. On FaceTime last night Eve said "you know my housemates are usually pretty into prioritizing mental health over marks. But I asked them 'what if I just said Fuck It and went to London this weekend' and all their eyes got really big and they said 'are you crazy'" so I think I probably can't come." Fair enough then).
Angus had a bit of a rough time last week - professors sounding off about students being unprepared and not coming to class (at the students who actually came to class, seems a little counterproductive but okay), the team not doing well - so I sent him an Easter tin of cookies and brownies from Mrs. Fields and he was very happy to get it.
We had a freezing rain event yesterday, which pissed me off even though I know April in Ottawa is no guarantee of spring-like weather. I stopped to get a couple of things at the grocery store after work (butter and milk and buttermilk, which amused me to no end), and I couldn't get to my cloth grocery bags because the trunk was frozen shut. My poor friends Sasha and Dani don't have power and are having PTSD from the last windstorm that knocked out their power for multiple days - HI SASHA, HI DANI, sorry the universe is being such a massive douche to you.
I hate sleeping in not-my-own bed. Mainly because sleep eludes me. We went on vacation recently and I slept TERRIBLY and had to do the thing where, every morning when my parents asked if I'd slept well, I had to choose whether to tell the truth (and thus explain my scrambled brain and moderate crankiness) or pretend it was great! thanks! It's not like they could DO anything about it.
Bummer that A and E can't join you. But I hope you have a wonderful weekend nonetheless, and that it's as stress free as possible.
I do hope your weekend is better than the stressful lead up to it! I find that travel is always better than my stress beforehand! Good luck!
I hope you had a lovely time at your sister's house. I had to search and open up a map of Canada to see where you were currently, to where you were traveling. I know nothing about Canada, travel wise.
Looks like it was a 'trip' indeed. I hate traveling somewhere where the weather is drastically different because I always feel unprepared.
It sucks all sorts of stuff that your kids won't be with you, and the fact that they're both busy and not loving everything they're into at the moment. I hope it passes. Well, I suppose school AND time do pass....