Random Crap

Angus posted this to our family chat: 


Eve has this problem on days when she doesn't go to school (which is now all the days) that if she gets dressed, Lucy thinks that means she's taking her for a walk. She follows her around nosing the back of her legs and if she stops she sits wagging her tail looking up expectantly. Mostly this is a good thing because it gets Eve out of the house and getting a little exercise every day. On the days when somebody else has already said they'll walk Lucy or it's raining and she really doesn't want to go, it's hilariously annoying. Sometimes I hear her yelling "I'm not getting dressed to take you out, I'm getting dressed so I don't GET DEPRESSION!"

Today she came down to do something in the kitchen and kept saying "stop looking at me like that! We're not going out!" "I'm ignoring you!" "She really thinks we're going". Then a few seconds later, "So... we're going, I guess". She maintained eye contact for too long. Rookie mistake.

I was trying to think of something I did when I was seventeen in a pandemic-less world. All I came up with was this bizarre memory of going with my boyfriend and my best friend and her boyfriend who was also my boyfriend's best friend (sorry) to some dance at the... legion, maybe? Why? Dunno. I felt like I looked incredibly hot in my peak late-eighties style - a magenta-purply sweater with like a kelly green collared thing underneath and a long jean skirt. Sexayyyy. My poor best friend had had to have surgery for some leg problem (she was a dancer) so she was in a cast and a pink Ralph Lauren sweatsuit. Her and her boyfriend did some remarkably creative chair dancing. At one point I was coming out of the bathroom at the same time as a fifty-ish man and he yelled "you're so drunk! -- oh! not you, sweetie, the old people." We got totally shitfaced and started writing stuff on Danielle's cast. Someone put a dot and wrote "they say this is a very sensitive spot" and then my boyfriend put an arrow to the dot and wrote "push here 4 orgasm". She thought it was the funniest thing she had ever seen, but eventually realized that she couldn't go to our (Catholic) school like that so she whited out orgasm and wrote oranges. 

Usually at this point in a blog post I would look for a way to tie all this together. I don't think there is one, other than I feel pretty lucky to be shut in with the people I'm shut in with, and I miss my friends. And, looking back, I'm also pretty happy that I seem to have kept up my early talent for surrounding myself with weird people who make me laugh. 


Comments

Collette said…
Why have I never heard that sorry before! I thought you were going to say she drew over it or whited it out, but changed it to "oranges"!?! That's freaking hilarious.
Ernie said…
Poor Eve. And I hate misplacing my glasses. I hope he has a great inventory of glasses at this speed.

Love the cast story and that you remember what you wore. Remember stirrup pants? Those drove me nuts because I was so tall my stirrup pants sagged and it looked like I had a load in my pants. It was almost as cruel as the toe socks I got for Christmas - I have webbed toes.
Nicole said…
This totally reminds me of when we visited our friends in Vancouver a couple of summers ago and the boys had a game of counting all the reading glasses. I think they found something like 15 pair in the tiny apartment.

Barkley gets all excited when I put on legwarmers. If I'm going for a walk without him - if the walk is longer than 2km - I actually give him a treat and put him in his crate so he can't see my legwarmers.
StephLove said…
I lost my spare pair of reading glasses back in February and never got around to replacing them and now I'm afraid of losing my main pair and being unable to read anything. I mean, we'd go to the CVS and get new ones, they're open, but we're trying to avoid that kind of errand.
Busy Bee Suz said…
Your children are hilarious.
You are hilarious.
Lucy is persistent.
Your post and your memory made me laugh.
It's so funny the random memories that pop into our brains.

Popular posts from this blog

Not Quitting My Other Day Job

Blog Jeopardy

Mean Spirits