Comedy, Tragedy, Horror and Drama. And I also like reading.
So this is just my life now?
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Went into the kids' bathroom to tidy up for cleaning today. Put away some mouthwash and moisturizer and moved a shaving kit. Found this. Because why not?
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Anonymous said…
Hah!
This has inspired me to take a photo of the next weird thing I see on the Things' bathroom floor. I couldn't possibly show ALL the weird things because it would take the rest of my life. Why why whyyyy does everything go on the floor?
Swear to Jobs! Thing 1 came home from school today and - right in front of me - whipped off a sock and threw it on his bedroom floor.
I may have actually growled like a mad dog. Who's to say? It's a mystery, really. Whatever primal sound I made it caused him to retrieve the sock immediately and head to the laundry room and avoid meeting my gaze. Just as well. There were daggers at the ready. ;)
temperedwithkindness, your story made me laugh with recognition. Maybe I should blog about times when I frightened my kids because of my reaction to something they did.
I don't know what odd things I might find lying around. Most of the time the objects I find out of place are ordinary, they're just in the Wrong. Freaking. Place.
" My Mom got a speeding ticket because she was looking at garage sales." "You don't have to poo on me!" "This is what we do. That's the way we do it." "What language is Jai Ho?" "My Mom had to bring my Dad his shoes because he had a doctor's appointment for his feet because his toes are all weird." "Una cerveza, por favor." "You're so cool -- constipated over-rated (something I didn't hear) loser." "For some reason I feel like some of the chocolate has nuts in it." "I don't think there's enough room." "I'm a tuna sandwich." "I can burp the alphabet but I'll just do A since it's your birthday." ********************* What are: Things you will hear (whether you want to or not) while driving to the North Gower Bowling Alley for your son's ninth birthday party with five boys in the back of a minivan.
To my American friends, I'm sorry. Not in any kind of distanced, pitying, smug way, because I believe we are headed in a similar direction here in Canada, and I am sad and sick at heart. I told myself I wasn't hoping for the other outcome because I was afraid to, but I realize that I absolutely was, because I was not prepared for how bad this would feel. Some random thoughts I am having about the whole thing. 1. I'm going to try not to hate anyone. For a while at least. I am totally cool with anyone else hating people that helped this happen. A lot of them did it out of hate. Some did it out of ignorance. Some are struggling and desperate and thought this was a solution. I know that's not an excuse, but it makes me think of when I read The Drowned and the Saved by Primo Levi. He said that he didn't feel like he could judge people who betrayed their fellow Jews for favours from their captors, because he was never given the opportunity and if he had he couldn't ...
I don't know how to do this other than as a sprawling, messy, off-in-all-directions thing. I can't do book reviews like Emily, who has her own little New York Times thingy going on at Edge of the Page . I remember this one professor I had for a few courses -- he was French, and big and bearish with spiky black hair and a beard, and it always seemed to me that he carried this towering body of knowledge around right on top of his head, and all he had to do was reach up and pluck out a few facts and an allusion or two, and there was another fucking brilliant off-the-cuff insight. In contrast, I always felt like I had a much smaller body of knowledge, and it was all tucked away in my pockets or left on my dresser at home, so I was always saying something like "well, it's like the goat in the desert and... wait!... something about Flaubert and feet, or everybody dreaming about Zeus and then walking funny..." I guess there's a good reason why I ended up writing abou...
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This has inspired me to take a photo of the next weird thing I see on the Things' bathroom floor. I couldn't possibly show ALL the weird things because it would take the rest of my life. Why why whyyyy does everything go on the floor?
Swear to Jobs! Thing 1 came home from school today and - right in front of me - whipped off a sock and threw it on his bedroom floor.
I may have actually growled like a mad dog. Who's to say? It's a mystery, really. Whatever primal sound I made it caused him to retrieve the sock immediately and head to the laundry room and avoid meeting my gaze. Just as well. There were daggers at the ready. ;)
I don't know what odd things I might find lying around. Most of the time the objects I find out of place are ordinary, they're just in the Wrong. Freaking. Place.