Thursday, November 21, 2013

Taylor-Made to Make Me Feel Like a Chump

When I was at Zarah's last week-end (why have I not written about my fabulous Week-end at Zarah's one day this week instead of the endless, grating whinge-fest? Why, I don't know, it's a perfectly valid question) we enjoyed a wide variety of Songza playlists while cooking, eating, cleaning up the kitchen or getting ready to go out. Okay, it's probably slightly inaccurate to say we enjoyed a WIDE variety of playlists. We figured out in short order that if we were presented with any option containing the word "Mom", (Mom-friendly pop hits! Classic hits for Moms! Mom's hanging-out music!) we should just take it. Apparently, as far as Songza goes, we are eminently predictable and mainstream and Mommish.

We picked something with a Joni Mitchell theme at one point, and this song came on. Without thinking, I said "I love this song." Which I do. But I didn't know it was a James Taylor song. I heard it in my head sung by a sweet, high female voice - no idea whose. Later that night in bed, I tried for an hour to find that version on iTunes, fruitlessly, and now I have three or four versions of it and they're all nice, but none is exactly RIGHT, and it's vexatious.

Then I remembered this guy in university telling me that Taylor had written this song after some friends of his had bought his wife a plane ticket to see one of his concerts and the plane had crashed and she had DIED. I mean, Jesus, right? And, well, the lyrics: "Just yesterday morning they let me know you were gone/ Susanne, the plans they made put an end to you", and "Sweet dreams and flying machines in pieces on the ground". Plus, I was nineteen and highly credulous.

Thing is, it's a load of crap. A fairly widely-disseminated load of crap, because it's mentioned on Wikipedia. The actual story, that a friend had committed suicide but the news was initially kept from Taylor, is arguably equally as sad, if less Hollywood. The other night when I mentioned the first anecdote at a dinner party, my friend's husband immediately said "that has 'urban legend' written all over it". But like I said, young, unskeptical, and there was no internet back then. And the thing is, I don't even know if the guy who told it to me actually thought it was true or if it was a line (he did kind of segue into "oh, you look so sad, let me hug you after I remove these incredibly heavy and cumbersome pants").

I'd like to think I've become a bit more discerning in the intervening years. I hardly ever give money away to strangers with sob stories any more. Eve still gets me every April Fool's Day, though. I guess that's okay.

Now I'm going to see if there's a playlist for Moms Doing an Excel Assignment, or Music to Accompany Your Laptop Flying Through the Air.

6 comments:

Steve Finnell said...

HISTORICAL FACTS BY FAITH

Why do I believe that the Bible is God's truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth? Why? Because of the bodily resurrection of Jesus Christ! Why do I believe in the resurrection? Why? Because it is a historical fact, recorded in the Bible. There are no living eye witnesses to the resurrection; I except the historical record in the Bible, by faith.

CAN HISTORICAL RECORDS BE TRUSTED?

Most men accept that Hannibal was born in 247 B.C. and was considered the greatest military tactician and strategist in European history. Why do men believe this? There are no living eye witnesses, so the historical record is accepted, by faith.

George Washington was the first president of the United States of America 1788-1797. Men accept this as fact, by faith, because of the historical record. There are no eye witnesses who are still alive.

1 Corinthians 15:3-8 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received, that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, 4 and that He was buried, and that He was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures, 5 and that He appeared to Cephas, then to the twelve. 6 After that He appeared to more than five hundred brethren at one time, most of whom remain until now, but some have fallen asleep; 7 then He appeared to James, then to all the apostles; 8 and at last of all, as to one untimely born, He appeared to me also.

I believe the Bible to be God's record for mankind. I believe it because of the bodily resurrection of Jesus Christ. I accept this as accurate historical facts, by faith.

THE RESURRECTION OF JESUS FROM THE GRAVE PUTS HIM IN A CLASS BY HIMSELF!

MEN ACCEPT SECULAR HISTORICAL FACT, BY FAITH.

WHY DO MEN NOT ACCEPT GOD'S BIBLICAL HISTORICAL FACTS, BY FAITH?


YOU ARE INVITED TO FOLLOW MY BLOG. http://steve-finnell.blogspot.com

Bibliomama said...

Dear Steve: What the Actual Fuck?
Love, Allison

Hannah said...

That's the best spam comment I've ever seen. You win all the internets, Allison. ALL OF THEM.

Maggie said...

You just don't see quality spam comments like that anymore! Good stuff!

Also the mere mention of James Taylor (JT before Justin Timberlake) rockets me back to HS and the ridiculous number of hours my friends and I spent listening to his greatest hits tape (that's right, tape, I'm an old). Am humming songs right now.

Mom of the Perpetually Grounded said...

Oh good lord Steve, who asked You?

Anyway. James Taylor is excellence. Fire and Rain, one of the best songs ever. Brought back memories. My brother used to play guitar and sing it all the time.

Nicole said...

I've always loved James Taylor but I did not have any idea of the legend surrounding that song! Huh!

I'm super impressed with your spam comment. I usually get things for penis enlargements or online poker. What am I doing wrong? I wish Steve would give me such information.