TMI Wednesdays - don't say you weren't warned.

My kids made an adorable video of them singing happy birthday to my husband on Angus's ipod touch, since he's in California this week and his birthday was on Monday. I can't figure out how to get it on here, so you'll just have to take my word for it that it's adorable. You likely wouldn't find it as adorable as a video of your own kids singing happy birthday to your own husband in California, because apparently everyone else with kids is deluded by DNA and years of evolution into thinking that their kids are cuter than mine.

After he called home the first time, I told the kids that Daddy had used a bad word when talking about the hotel he was staying in. They giggled. I asked them if they wanted to hear what it was. They beamed happily and nodded. I said it quietly. A little later, Eve was talking about rockets and suddenly she said "but I probably shouldn't say it". I asked her what the heck she was talking about and she said "you know, like you said before about Daddy's hotel room... (whispering) it was a shuttle?" I said "I didn't say shuttle, I said shithole".

After my chiropractor appointment today I stopped at the drug store that's right on the way home, which is a Shopper's Drug Mart but not my usual one. The usual one is closer but I was going to the community centre to register Eve for swimming lessons and I would be going home a different way. Don't you hate going to a store that's the same but different from your regular one? Nothing's in the right place, but it all looks basically the same so it keeps fooling you into thinking it should be. I needed advil and kleenex and HEMORRHOIDAL OINTMENT (for which I blame the children). Once I almost stabbed a guy because he stood there for like twenty minutes lingering right in front of the HEMORRHOIDAL OINTMENT and I didn't really want to say "excuse me, I just need to reach past you to grab this HEMORRHOIDAL OINTMENT". Anyway, this Shoppers Drug Mart was stupid. I found laxatives and gas suppressants and all manner of stuff related to the ass, and no HEMORRHOIDAL OINTMENT. Shouldn't they logically keep all the ass stuff together?

And on that note, you should really read my friend Patti's very important post on a very important medical test, which I totally meant to segue into at this point because obviously I wouldn't go on and on about HEMORRHOIDAL OINTMENT just for cheap laughs. Although I did feel an explicable urge to giggle like an idiot when someone used the word 'rectify' the other day.