I'm SO sorry, Girl who was doing my pedicure!

Photo by Tambako the Jaguar
There are certain things I've always been fastidious about. Some would say borderline obsessive-compulsive, and they wouldn't necessarily be wrong, but I prefer to think of it as being fastidious. Actually I don't love the word fastidious. Actually the more I type it and think it, the more I dislike it. The t and the d are too close together, and there's something unseemly about those two i's. So let's call it... meticulous? ANYWAY... I've always washed my face several times a day, especially when I'm wearing glasses instead of contacts, because I hate feeling like my face is oily and my glasses are sliding down my nose. I take a shower in the morning and usually a quick one at night, sometimes to regulate my wonky body temperature before going to bed, sometimes just to rinse off the day. When I had Angus and was exhausted and insane for the first few weeks, I thought that might break the bedtime shower habit. It didn't. Sometimes I even got up and combed my hair and brushed my teeth before breastfeeding at 2 a.m. And 3 a.m. And 5:30 a.m. Yeah, okay, even I can see that that doesn't so much put me in the non-crazy column. The point is, even though I have two kids and no memory now, even though I'm often depressed and lacking in drive and unlacking in ass, I generally took enough time to make sure I still looked presentable. True, this may have taken the form of looking in every mirror in every room I passed just to ascertain that my chin was too fat and my eyebrows were too thick and my forehead was somehow just too THERE, or taking down and putting up my hair six times, sitting on the floor crying and then wondering where the last forty-six minutes went and why my scalp was a little warm, but everybody defines 'taking pride in your appearance' differently, okay?

Over the past few weeks, though, something weird has been happening. I run errands, pick Eve up from school, take her home, wait for Angus to show up and get homework and dinner started. Normally I would have to wash my face, change my clothes and maybe even shower again. Now sometimes I don't get back to my mirror until bedtime. Sometimes I look okay. Sometimes I look bad. Whatever.

And then today, I was getting a pedicure with my friend Pam and I rolled up my pant legs and looked down and almost died of embarrassment.......... the hair on my legs was like FOUR INCHES LONG!!!!! And I don't think I've ever gone more than a day or two without shaving my legs. When girls in my residence would joke about only shaving once a week or not shaving until exams were over or even just not shaving as a matter of principle I would smile insincerely and wonder what on EARTH was WRONG with them (hey, I have principles. I just prefer them not to snag on my tights). And now even when I concentrate, I... I... I can't remember the last time I shaved my legs. (whimper)

I honestly don't know if I should be glad that I'm getting less obsessive, or sad that, clearly, I've finally decided to just let myself go.

On the bright side, the other afternoon I dropped in on Pam and she had jam in her hair.

(Sorry Pammy, if I'm going down, I'm takin' everyone I can with me!)


Anonymous said…
I am very meticulous about shaving my armpits, but my legs not so much. In my defense, I am blond and so I can get away with it.

And I am not a twice a day shower-er, but I am a daily shower-er. When I talk to my mom friends who can go days without showering, I so don't get it. I also hear you on the glasses thing, which is why I always wear my contacts.
Mary Lynn said…
I used to be a daily showerer, but somehow in the last year I've let that slide. I'm pretty much every other day now. The funny thing is that my hair seems to be in better shape now--it used to be so frizzy all the time. Now it's occasionally frizzy and occasionally nice looking. One of my friends asked me the other week, "did you style your hair this morning?" I just laughed, "how long have you known me? Would I ever style my hair in the morning?"

As for the legs, I thought we all just kinda let the leg shaving slide in the Winter. It's one of the perks of being a woman living in Canada.
Susanne said…
Hilarious, but I can do one better. The first pedicure I had, I didn't know they were going to roll up the pants SO high... I shaved my ankles only. You can imagine the girl's disgust when she got up to my calves. I died of embarrassment.
Anonymous said…
Hairy legs...it's bound tohappen at least once in our lives! Susanne' comment is hilarious...only shaving the ankles, now that sounds like something I'd do!
Anonymous said…
LMAO! The more you hang with me, the worse it will get. I am the OCD antidote, thanks to my amazing ability to focus only on the big picture. Your toes look fabulous as does the rest of you. And don't knock the jam conditioning treatment until you've tried it. Peanut butter works well too.
Julie said…
That would be me. Armpits yes, legs in the winter, no. But now that we have started swimming lessons, I've started again. In the summer, every two days or whent he 5 o'clock shadow sets in.

Gotta shower everyday during the week, weekends if i am going out of the house. Mary-Lynn's got a point there about frizzy hair and over showering. someting to ponder? ;-)

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