Tuesday, February 23, 2016

Turning It Off Then Back On

Apparently that's what the universe decided to do to me, hence the accidental hiatus. I finished my year-end book review (rather triumphantly, I thought), went for a physical and got a (more-or-less) clean bill of health, then was immediately felled by three or four passing opportunistic viruses. You know that moment when you finally realize that stumbling around trying to pretend you can still cook stuff and keep a reasonably orderly house and parent your children and put words together in order is just pathetic and is fooling no one and it's a giant relief to go to your bedroom and collapse and snarl at anyone who ventures near without a root beer popsicle or a strong sedative? No? Just me?

In the midst of the first virus, I proved how much I love my daughter by taking her to the mall for a birthday shopping trip. While sick. On a Friday. On a P.D. Day. In winter. I further demonstrated my devotion when the last small size of a shirt she wanted wasn't on the shelf, so I dismembered a mannequin to get it. I don't think she appreciated that quite as much (hey, it could have been worse, it was still wearing a bra).

In the midst of the second virus (the barfing kind) we got fifty centimetres of snow in one day and the city ground to a halt, so I was slightly grateful to be stuck inside by default (although I would have been more grateful if I was stuck inside lounging with a glamorously feverish glow in a bed jacket rather than with my head in the toilet). And I did just type 'greatful' the first time, proving that I'm not quite back up to optimal operating parameters. My husband left for Japan on Saturday, so I'm also grateful (GRATEFUL, goddammit) that I'm at least upright this week (for the next storm that's supposed to hit tomorrow).

Missed you all. Happy to be back.